Sometimes you just want to have a drink with someone.
(Swine Flu) Contains information YOU cant get anywhere else!
At this rate it will take over 303,824,640 days for the whole population to die of flu.
out of all the mofos in mexico who got the flu and died since based off their official population a little division gives me 6.5%. so 6.5% of those infected will result in death. no matter all the infected people will be at home in bed while were all out getting flat screens and new cars! YeeeeeeeeeeeHaaaaaaaaaa!
Current statistics from MedStor scientifc biostatistics
april 23- 2
april 24- 20
april 25- 81
april 26- 132
as of 17:31 zulu (sounds so badass thats why i use zulu time if ya dont know what that is go here http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/info/timezone.htm)
well with acceleration of the spread of the outbreak those numbers should exponentially grow.
Swine flu is classified as H1N1 if your wondering then yes swine flue is a sub type or the baby brother of bird flu.
Bird Flu is classified as H5N1 so make sure you know these details or next time you wax smart someones gonna call bullshit. Doesnt fuckin matter really these are just classifications for strains their common names swine flu and bird flu are just as good if someone is actually saying H5N1 or H1N1 in conversation do me a favor and punch them in the mouth for trying to be a know it all.
Lemme throw some of dat knowledge down
this is a Type A Influenza, there are 3 types as follows.
A Easiest for humans like you to get so your on the list bros and hos.
B Ut oh someone shifted and it is now airborne!! that means breathing where sick people are makes you sick
C rare and ya know why when it does surface its like the plague and infects everyone
maybe you will die and here are the symptoms to know if your number just got punched
These symptoms can manifest themselves at first one at a time or in a given combination of factors.
fever,sore throat, coughing, muscle aches. (Those are from the CDC and they LIE)
More proof that the CDC lies they want you to wash your hands to prevent contamination. That kind of jerk off advice is about as useful as hiding under a desk if someone drops a nuke.
They wont tell you this but to play it safe and for a more down to earth way to tell what the symptoms are it goes like this, watch for trouble breathing (change in breathing either slower or faster), being irritable (not your period or roids rage), being light headed while getting up, getting confused about everyday things (like where are my car keys), getting a severe headache even briefly is a sign of the apocalypse being wrought on your ass. (These are from my research and I dont lie)
Death is typically induced in subjects either by respiratory disease or pneumonia contracted from the breakdown of the body after acquiring this strain of influenza.
THERE IS NO VACCINE! Only 2 types of vaccine exist for the general population, I know theres tons of vaccines but their made of the same 2 things mostly. These strains are resistant to those types and as of right now there is no vaccine.
thats enough for now kids have fun and look I learned something in school!
P.S.- DONT GO TO A FUCKING HOSPITAL! theres no cure so if you get this strain of flu just break into the local pharmacy and steal their antibiotics, once you get it all you can do is minimize the population of the virus in your body and prevent it from spreading to other parts of your body like the lungs, !there is nothing to outright stop or cure it!
P.S.S- DO NOT GET A FLU SHOT!
Colonels Advice for Surviving an epidemic-
30 days food and water and alcohol
Assault weapons, handguns and ammo afterall if the family next door runs out of food their coming after you
if you fail to have any of the above you fail at life and darwin or your neighbor in this case will sort your shit out for ya.
only the strong survive not the brightest or the smartest I said strong so be strong and take out the rest.
TO SURVIVE THE FLU GO TO MADAGASCAR!
The Colonel Knows all!
out of all the mofos in mexico who got the flu and died since based off their official population a little division gives me 6.5%. so 6.5% of those infected will result in death. no matter all the infected people will be at home in bed while were all out getting flat screens and new cars! YeeeeeeeeeeeHaaaaaaaaaa!
Current statistics from MedStor scientifc biostatistics
april 23- 2
april 24- 20
april 25- 81
april 26- 132
as of 17:31 zulu (sounds so badass thats why i use zulu time if ya dont know what that is go here http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/info/timezone.htm)
well with acceleration of the spread of the outbreak those numbers should exponentially grow.
Swine flu is classified as H1N1 if your wondering then yes swine flue is a sub type or the baby brother of bird flu.
Bird Flu is classified as H5N1 so make sure you know these details or next time you wax smart someones gonna call bullshit. Doesnt fuckin matter really these are just classifications for strains their common names swine flu and bird flu are just as good if someone is actually saying H5N1 or H1N1 in conversation do me a favor and punch them in the mouth for trying to be a know it all.
Lemme throw some of dat knowledge down
this is a Type A Influenza, there are 3 types as follows.
A Easiest for humans like you to get so your on the list bros and hos.
B Ut oh someone shifted and it is now airborne!! that means breathing where sick people are makes you sick
C rare and ya know why when it does surface its like the plague and infects everyone
maybe you will die and here are the symptoms to know if your number just got punched
These symptoms can manifest themselves at first one at a time or in a given combination of factors.
fever,sore throat, coughing, muscle aches. (Those are from the CDC and they LIE)
More proof that the CDC lies they want you to wash your hands to prevent contamination. That kind of jerk off advice is about as useful as hiding under a desk if someone drops a nuke.
They wont tell you this but to play it safe and for a more down to earth way to tell what the symptoms are it goes like this, watch for trouble breathing (change in breathing either slower or faster), being irritable (not your period or roids rage), being light headed while getting up, getting confused about everyday things (like where are my car keys), getting a severe headache even briefly is a sign of the apocalypse being wrought on your ass. (These are from my research and I dont lie)
Death is typically induced in subjects either by respiratory disease or pneumonia contracted from the breakdown of the body after acquiring this strain of influenza.
THERE IS NO VACCINE! Only 2 types of vaccine exist for the general population, I know theres tons of vaccines but their made of the same 2 things mostly. These strains are resistant to those types and as of right now there is no vaccine.
thats enough for now kids have fun and look I learned something in school!
P.S.- DONT GO TO A FUCKING HOSPITAL! theres no cure so if you get this strain of flu just break into the local pharmacy and steal their antibiotics, once you get it all you can do is minimize the population of the virus in your body and prevent it from spreading to other parts of your body like the lungs, !there is nothing to outright stop or cure it!
P.S.S- DO NOT GET A FLU SHOT!
Colonels Advice for Surviving an epidemic-
30 days food and water and alcohol
Assault weapons, handguns and ammo afterall if the family next door runs out of food their coming after you
if you fail to have any of the above you fail at life and darwin or your neighbor in this case will sort your shit out for ya.
only the strong survive not the brightest or the smartest I said strong so be strong and take out the rest.
TO SURVIVE THE FLU GO TO MADAGASCAR!
The Colonel Knows all!
Views: 1
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on -
Just for fun here is the outbreak locations and spread
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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um ok so noone cares
check my links for sauce as I dont make this shit up.
the virus is now GLOBAL as of 23:46:31 Zulu Time
Britian has reported the outbreak spreading like wildfire
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/8019544.stm
Australia has confirmed cases
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,25197,25391350-26103,0...
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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Like i said earlier there is no cure
antibiotics can only slow the progression of the virus or reduce the numbers of pathogens in the body preventing further damage, there is no magic bullet or magic pill though.
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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Just hit california
doe to the population density expect the number of reported cases to be very high.
california is kind of like the canary in the coal mine, if it erupts there then expect the east coast to have a mirrored effect. That means that any outbreak in california and how many are infected or die will match what we should expect here in philadelphia. we run models on these kinds of scenarios and they check out that way 100% of the time.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/04/22/swine.flu.california/
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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so dont read this i notice 0 comments geez haha i could blog this on like twitter but i would rather they all DIE! haha im an asshole but i know that we need to sort some people out so im not going to post this there.
Threat level upgraded as pandemic reaches new massive proportions affects all social and economic classes. Typically the rich are the last to get sick since their well protected. In this situation that defense is meaniingless and their all dropping dead like the bitches they are.
As of 20:56 Zulu time we have escalated the pandemic to Phase 4, there are only 6 phases.
Phase 4 generally means that you can get it from human-human contact, so sharing a smoke using a glass at the bar or breathing around other sick people increases your chance of getting the flu.
In Phase 2 an animal influenza virus circulating among domesticated or wild animals is known to have caused infection in humans.
In Phase 3, an animal or human-animal influenza reassortant virus has caused sporadic cases or small clusters of disease in people, but has not resulted in human-to-human transmission sufficient to sustain community-level outbreaks. Limited human-to-human transmission may occur under some circumstances, for example, when there is close contact between an infected person and an unprotected caregiver. However, limited transmission under such restricted circumstances does not indicate that the virus has gained the level of transmissibility among humans necessary to cause a pandemic.
Phase 4 is characterized by verified human-to-human transmission of an animal or human-animal influenza reassortant virus able to cause “community-level outbreaks.” The ability to cause sustained disease outbreaks in a community marks a significant upwards shift in the risk for a pandemic. Any country that suspects or has verified such an event should urgently consult with WHO so that the situation can be jointly assessed and a decision made by the affected country if implementation of a rapid pandemic containment operation is warranted. Phase 4 indicates a significant increase in risk of a pandemic but does not necessarily mean that a pandemic is a forgone conclusion.
Phase 5 is characterized by human-to-human spread of the virus into at least two countries in one WHO region. While most countries will not be affected at this stage, the declaration of Phase 5 is a strong signal that a pandemic is imminent and that the time to finalize the organization, communication, and implementation of the planned mitigation measures is short.
Phase 6, the pandemic phase, is characterized by community level outbreaks in at least one other country in a different WHO region in addition to the criteria defined in Phase 5. Designation of this phase will indicate that a global pandemic is under way.
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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There are groups out there spreading massive amounts of disinformation to the AP reuters and all cable news networks and local networks. All known blogging sites have been compromised successfully as other idiots just copy and paste the propaganda being distributed in a rush to the first to blog on these topics. this way the people who read those blogs will hopefully be the first ones to over react and the resultant effects being death or serious injury would be considered a success to these types.
these efforts are meant to increase the feeling of panic and cause stupid people to do crazy things. its fun to watch them so i support these efforts but bewar forened that what you hear or read anywhere but here may be false news. Faked news generated by people in these other groups seeking to gain influence by using images doctored videos and phony stories to make it all seem real
as Flavor Flav said dont believe the hype
Ctick with Colonel and you may live to see another day and get a 50 inch plasma tv.
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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New Police Actions Deployed to Combat Swine Flu
Police are now authorized nationally to pull over drivers who appear sick and if they are suspected of being sick be removed and placed in quarantine by the officer immediately.
YaY phase 4 is jumping to 6 skipping phase 5!!!!!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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New Map of Death!!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Bish Uncool on -
Wow. Thats alot of info to take in. hahah Keep up the good work dude.
I can't help but wish this flu was zombies instead. That'd be fun.
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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Check it out as of today the epidemic has reached such epic proportions that the mexican government has closed ALL SCHOOLS! all night clubs
Also all restaurants have been ordered to serve take out food only.
what this boils down to is that mexico is minimizing the risk of people coming into contact with eachother. This will fail miserably since people will still go out for food get drunk ahve one night stands and lets not forget that Cinco de Mayo is right around the corner.
Mexico is a typical ground zero area that is used in projections and forecasting to site future trends. Models I work with show that the virus will spread to neighboring countries and infected areas will not be quarantined. They will not be quarantined due to the infection being treatable, only when the hospitals run out of the 2 drugs available tamiflu and Rolenza will quarantine be used and by that point it will be too late. All air traffic continues to flow and each plane has its own interior air system circulating the flu to insure 100% infection among the passenger on board, pretty kick ass huh?
Typical infection rates increase only as long as people continue about there everyday grind which they will because their monkeys and arent good for much else anyways. smart people will take precautions! not wearing a mask around but get sick now!
IF YOU KNOW A SICK PERSON GO GET THE FLU NOW! Go make out with them or if their the same sex share a cigarette joint beer whatever floats your boat or if your into ti make out with them too. it is treatable and once your bodies immunity system recognizes the infection it can create an attack against them so you cant get sick again. its like when your a kid and your mom sends you to go play with the kids who have measles and chicken pox.
THERE WILL BE NO MORE DRUGS! I ahve access to alot of information that news and pretty much everyone doesnt. So here is how it works new drugs have to be made from seed material. That seed material is put into a big vat like a pot and then the germs make the medication, sounds yummy doesnt it? well that is not going to be able to happen until may of next year. that is just how shit works it cant happen overnight and their to slow to do it any better and the seeding material hasnt even arrived at production sites nor has it been granted approval to be used in the next flu vaccine.
In closing dont forget that if you get it later youll probably die. this strain of flu is having a medically uncommon side effect that makes the bodies immune system go into overdrive. that means that if you get sick your body starts killing off your organs pretty gross way to die. so GET SICK NOW and be SAFE LATER!
Stay Alive
Stick with the Colonel
I love that I write this shit and only one person read it, good at least that one person will live since their smart. i could post this publicly but that would be wrong since their not supposed to know this much, you guys are lucky, hope your taking advantage of this.
Latest suckers to hit the list
Israel and New Zealand but thats old news i told you that days ago! why cuz i know the shit they dont! hahahahaha
dont forget how crowded israel is so their all going to get it, fuckers dont even have phones they use cells, cuz its too crowded to actually set up telephone polls, shit you not but if our not jewish you wouldnt know that, but now ya do and knowing is half the battle!
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/discussion/2009/04/28/...
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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I dont condone this or support this, your on your own if you amke the sky fall, kill yourself, or turn into a frog.
Here is how to make tamiflu:
http://superkuh.ath.cx/users/superkuh/Library/H5N1/oseltamivir.txt
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Permalink Reply by Colonel Matthews on
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figured you conspiracy theorists would just love this
is it man made well no that would just be retarded, not to mention whoever pulled it off would be a genius and since no papers are written about it i call bullshit on that idea. though this correlation is strange, though if some scientist effed up well then he wouldnt want to be known, so yea i spose the possibility of manmade through some uber F$#@up is possible and if it is possible it would have come from here.
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/142835.php
dont start wearing a tin foil hat now im just bringin you the real deal.
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